We have all said it. The words just tumble out before we even realize what we are saying.
- “I have to do this.”
- “I have to send this email.”
- “I have to meet with these people.”
It sounds so normal. It sounds so responsible. But every single time we say those words, we are quietly telling ourselves that our work is a burden. And we want to help you flip that script today in the simplest way possible.
Why Shifting From “Have To” to “Get To” Matters
There is something that happens when we talk about our businesses and what is on our list for the day. Naturally we go into “I have to.” “I have to do this. I have to send this email. I have to meet with these people.”
It feels like the honest thing to say. After all, there are tasks that need to get done. There are responsibilities waiting for us. But here is the thing we have learned over the years. The language we use shapes the way we experience our own lives.
When you say “I have to,” you are putting yourself in a position of obligation. You are telling your brain that this thing in front of you is a weight you are carrying. And over time, that language adds up. It builds a quiet resentment in the background of your days.
We believe we are called to more than just getting through our to do lists. We are called to all the things God’s called us to in relationship and joy in knowing Him. And it just shouldn’t be a drudgery. It just shouldn’t be.
The Small Shift From “Have To” To “Get To”
We have totally intentionally flipped our language to “Today, I get to.”
It is such a small thing. It is one word. But that one word carries a completely different posture.
“I have to do this.”
“I get to do this.”
Do you feel the difference? The first one makes your shoulders tense up. The second one opens something up in your chest. It reminds you that there is someone on the other end of what you are doing.
There is a connection happening. There is a business that you built with your own two hands and you get to show up for it.
This is not about pretending everything is easy. It is about choosing to see the privilege that is already there but gets buried under the weight of the “have tos.”
What Shifting From “Have To” To “Get To” Looks Like
Let us make this really practical. This is not just a nice idea. This is something we practice in the middle of our actual messy lives.
One morning I dropped my kids off at school at their Mother’s Day Out program. And on the way home I had this thought. “Man, I get to go home and record and bring together one of my best friends in life with business. What a privilege that is.”
That is the shift.
And I get to do it from the comfort of my home with my dementia dog behind me who’s struggling in life. And I get to just hang out.
Most of the time I’m working in workout clothes and in comfy places. Sometimes out on my back porch in the sunlight. Sometimes on my comfy couch with a cozy blanket. Lots of “I get to’s” with this.
The Flexibility You Were Building For
Here is where this mindset shift really proves its worth. My parents were just here visiting for a week. And I got to pull back a little bit from my tasks that week. I got to be more present with them.
That is the flexibility and the fluidity we have been working toward. That is the whole point.
So if you are building a business or thinking about building one, I think it’s so important to look at the “get to’s” and to keep in mind why we’re doing what we’re doing. Your business is not your only or your sole or your highest priority. It’s interrelated with all the things God’s called us to.
How To Start Shifting Your Mindset From “Have To” To “Get To”
You do not need a whole life overhaul to start this. You just need to pay attention.
1. Catch The “I Have To” When It Shows Up
The first step is just noticing. When you hear yourself say “I have to do this,” pause for half a second. Do not beat yourself up about it. Just notice it.
2. Flip It On Purpose
Say it again out loud or in your head. “Today, I get to.” Even if it feels a little awkward at first. The words will start to shape the feeling.
3. Look For The Specific Gift
Ask yourself what the privilege is inside the thing you are doing. Find one small thing and name it.
4. Give Yourself Grace On The Hard Days
Some days are just heavy. You do not have to fake it. But even on those days, you can look for one “I get to.”
A Small Step You Can Take Today
If you are reading this and feeling the weight of all your “have tos,” just take one small step.
Listen to your own words today.
Pay attention to how many times you say or think “I have to.” And then pick just one of those moments and flip it on purpose. Say out loud or write down, “I get to do this thing.”
That is it. You do not have to get it perfect. You just have to start noticing.
We want to build businesses that fit our lives and not the other way around. Sometimes we just need to change our language so we can see what is already there.
You have got this. We have got you. Now go find your first “I get to.”
